Day 2: Baby steps on the path

I am SO impatient…

When I decide that I want something or need something, I gotta have it NOW. I don’t want to wait. And, unfortunately, I don’t want to work too hard for it either.

I was watching a movie the other day and somebody said “You want success without sacrifice, you want progress without pain, and that’s just not possible.” Yup, that sums me up.

I acknowledge it, I am exposing it, so that I can change it…

Being impatient also causes me to try and change everything all at once. Join a gym! Find the right diet! Buy a new workout video!! Empty the fridge!!!! You get the picture. That is exhausting and overwhelming and never lasts long either. I need to force myself to slow down and take some baby steps.

Baby steps… they never come without some tumbles and bruises. But there’s something inside that baby that drives them to get back up and keep on trying. I need some of THAT in me.

Baby step 2: I have mentally decided that this is a lifelong journey. Unfortunately, it is not going to end in 90 days, or even 365 days. I will always have the same weaknesses, the same tendencies, and will have to stay vigilant until I breathe my last breath. Sounds a bit like AA… well, it seems like they are the experts and they got something right.

Let me just warn you, I do not intend to be a weight loss expert. I will probably never share exercise tips or recipes… that is not my goal. I just want to share my real thoughts on this path and find some people to walk along with me. It’s easier to keep going when you know you are not walking alone…

We are never alone

 

 

Day 1: Step on the path

 

I am NOT healthy…

Selah. (That means, stop and think about it.)

I weigh 286 pounds. I can barely breathe when I walk up the stairs. I eat too much.  I am embarrassed to see myself in pictures. I don’t like looking at myself in the mirror. Truth is, I just don’t like myself.

I am not healthy in mind or in body…. but I WANT TO BE.

I want to be strong. I want to be self-confident. I want my husband to be proud to stand by my side. I want to like myself.

But all this wanting has gotten me nowhere. I am 46 years old and I can’t seem to change my habits. I can’t even pinpoint my greatest weakness. To say that I don’t have time to exercise is a lie. Last Friday, I spent 5 hours in front of the TV, just snacking and vegetating. I have the time.

What I don’t have is energy and motivation.

I get tired. I get discouraged. Then I give up. Can you relate? I am trying to be real with you and with myself. I am tired of living a pretend life. I want to live a FULL life to the FULLEST. Today I am ready to do whatever it takes to find that path.

Step 1, Day 1: My body does not belong to me. It’s a loaner.

“Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.”  1 Corinthians 6:19,20  NLT

The only thing I am sure about in life is my faith, so this will be my starting point. My body belongs to God. It seems like we take better care of stuff that does not belong to us. Do you agree? We are really careful with borrowed things because the last thing we want to do is return a damaged item to the owner. Well the truth is, we are all on borrowed time, living life in temporary bodies given to us by our Maker.

We don’t get to be here long.

I have polluted this temple, misused it and nearly destroyed it. I acknowledge that fact and I am sorry. Now I am determined to turn around and start walking a different path. God has gotten me through some horrible stuff. I am asking Him to join me on this journey too.

 Dear Lord, next time I go to shove a cookie in my mouth, please help me to remember that my body does not belong to me and I need to take better care of it. Please help me to find my satisfaction in You, not in food. Please give me the strength I need to make it through Day 2.

Amen.

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the journey of a hundred miles begins with one step